Relationships and Family

Our relationships with family and friends can be the most valuable things in our lives, but often we take them for granted. This month the "Focus on You" objective is to reconnect with friends and family and enrich these relationships.

You may feel that arthritis has created barriers between you and those most important to you. Maybe your disease means you can't meet your friends out for dinner and drinks as often as you'd like or you are self-conscious about meeting new people. Maybe your spouse doesn't always understand why you are so tired or your kids get confused when you can't play with them after school.

This month when you do your daily 10-minute meditation, focus on how you'd like to see your relationships change. Think of one person you would like to get to know, spend more time with or educate about arthritis. Afterward write down what steps you'll take to reach out to this person.

Don't overdo it

Make your goals simple and achievable:

Maybe you suggest to your friends that you have potluck at someone's house on a weekend afternoon. This alternative will provide a more relaxed atmosphere for everyone including you and the host. The earlier time will allow you to get home in bed earlier for a healthy night's rest. The potluck aspect will take the pressure off the host who normally would do all the cooking, which will be most beneficial when it's your turn to host.

If meeting people is a problem, sign up for an exercise class or support group.

Find a book on chronic illness and relationships that you and your spouse can read together.

Talk to your kids about finding activities you can do with them like reading, coloring or a craft.

The important thing is to show these people that you care about them and you don't want your disease to come between you. When they see you reaching out, maybe they'll be more willing to reach back.